gaslighting

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Parenting the Parent: How Covert Narcissists Steal Childhoods and How to Heal

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Were you forced to grow up too soon? Did you feel responsible for managing your parent’s emotions, household duties, or even their well-being? If so, you may have experienced parentification, a term that describes when a child takes on the role of a parent—either emotionally or physically—due to their caregiver’s unmet responsibilities.

For adult children of covert narcissists, this experience is all too common. Instead of being nurtured, they were expected to provide emotional support, household management, and even emotional regulation for their narcissistic parent.

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Unmasking Narcissism

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While there are so many similarities in the stories of those dealing with a covert narcissism, narcissism does exist on a spectrum and can manifest differently in individuals. Traits from multiple types of narcissism may be present in the same individual. Root causes often involve a mix of genetics, childhood experiences, and environmental influences. Each type of narcissism can present with overt traits, covert traits, or a combination of both.

All of these different manifestations of narcissism add to the confusion for those who are dealing with it in their lives. Understanding the different types and faces of narcissism can aid in developing effective coping strategies, workarounds, or boundary setting. It is such a necessary part of your healing journey!

Covert Narcissism and their Subtle Tactics of Manipulation and Control

One of the most challenging aspects of covert narcissistic abuse is its subtle nature. Unlike overt narcissism, which is more easily recognizable through grandiose behavior or obvious arrogance, covert narcissism thrives on subtle manipulation that is harder to detect. These tactics are designed to undermine your confidence, control your behavior, and make you question your reality, often leaving you feeling confused, invalidated, and powerless.

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DISCLAIMER: THE INFORMATION PROVIDED BY RENEE SWANSON, COVERT NARCISSISM PODCAST, AND CNG LIFE COACHING IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT TO BE USED FOR DIAGNOSIS PURPOSES AND NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE.

THIS MATERIAL DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL. RENEE SHARES STORIES FROM HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AS WELL AS FROM THOSE SHE HAS TALKED WITH FOR SEVERAL YEARS. HER MATERIAL DOES NOT CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON HAS NARCISSISM AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS MATERIAL TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION OR SUPPORT A CLAIM THAT ANY SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE MATERIAL AND INFORMATION PROVIDED.