I was told that I am the only person who sees anger in him. He said that he asked his friends and co-workers. Friends?? He has no friends. He doesn’t do anything with anyone, ever. He sits in the house and plays video games, night after night and all day on the weekends.

When I finally asked him who he was talking about, he named friends from high school that he hadn’t seen in years. He named a friend who lives on the other side of the world, with whom he stays connected through email. Of course these friends don’t see anger in you. They don’t even see you!

Then he named his coworkers. Ok, at least these are people you see in your daily life. However, they have no social interactions outside of work. They only know him in the work environment, and most of that is computer interaction. They certainly don’t live with you.

Saying that you are the only person who thinks like that completely invalidates your feelings. It is an attempt to devalue what you are saying and prove you wrong. But again, these are people who do not live with you behind closed doors and are not a part of your intimate relationship. Even close friends are not IN the relationship. Their knowledge of all that is going on is still very limited.

In reality, it really doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. This relationship with this person is your relationship. No one else’s. If you don’t like the way you are being treated, who cares what the friends and coworkers think? This isn’t about them in the first place.